Loading My Weapons!

I wouldn't say this characterizes my whole life, but I've definitely gone through seasons of defeat where I've felt like I just can't measure up, or catch up, or wake up! This may be one of those times. I didn't post last week to the blog hop because I honestly didn't know what to say. I felt at first a little overwhelmed by my week, preparing for a birthday party and family coming to town. I was thinking I was dropping the ball by not getting my thoughts together to share, and then, I thought, "What's the point in writing something just to write something?" In all honesty, my heart was in no place to entertain my thoughts. I was too distracted. I was reading through the chapters, but needed time to think about all that underlining I was doing!

This week is different. Driving home from the gym earlier, God reminded me that "your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour." (1 Peter 5:8) Wait, wasn't that our memory verse from chapter 5? Yes! And hasn't Lysa been reminding us that "our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realm?" (Ephesians 6:12) Yes! Then, why am I giving satan (I hate writing his name) so much ammo to use against me? In church Sunday, our pastor started a new series called free. I have no doubt it's going to be a great series and even piece lots of things together for me from what I'm learning in the online Bible study (OBS).

Paul writes about "our" problem in the following verses, "I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do. And if I do what I do not want to do, I agree that the law is good. As it is, it is no longer I myself who do it, but it is sin living in me. I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature. For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out. For what I do is not the good I want to do; no, the evil I do not want to do--this I keep on doing." (Romans 7: 15-19)

I'm having a haha moment! Can you see the struggle in all the do's and don't do's? Our struggle is with the sin that's in us, the sin that snake brought into the world! So again, "Why do I give satan so much ammo to use against me?" I think it's because I'm not perfect, but as God's daughter and with His Almighty Strength, I can again remind myself of Lysa's definition of imperfect progress: Imperfect changes are slow steps of progress wrapped in grace...imperfect progress. Do you know how I visualize this? Jesus's arms wrapped around me daily, giving a slight little squeeze of encouragement (if I'm looking for it!) A Jesus Hug!! (I'll share one day soon about how this idea of the Jesus hug came to be:) For now, it's a little way I've learned to recognize joyfulness in my life along the way.

In conclusion, to talk about the impact this study is making on me is a treat. I think it's obvious from reading, how God's word is coming alive in my life right now. I'm revisiting scriptures that are popping up in my head. I'm also looking for connections in this study and in church of what God would like to teach me right now. Also, to throw out a little of the blessings you guys talked about last week...I have been blessed by the positive thinking Lysa brings to the pages of Unglued. Thank you for studying so hard for us and offering up so many useful tips! A couple of favorites:

"I can't control the things that happen to me each day, but I can control how I think about them." pg. 23

"Refuse to wallow in the depressing angst condemnation brings. On the other hand, embrace any conviction you feel. Condemnation defeats us. Conviction unlocks the greatest potential for change." pg. 47

I also love the scripture she talks about where God's word will not return to us empty, but will accomplish God's desires and achieve His purposes! (Isaiah 55:10-11) pg. 73

To wrap it up again:).. I refuse to let satan have so much power over the way I feel and react. Instead, I'm going to remind myself that Jesus erased all sin by dying for the Ungodly (Romans 5:6), the sinners.."But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us." (Romans 5:8)

Back off little s, I'm a child of God and He loves me! He'll give me what I need to fight, so I'm loading my weapons!

Kim